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Harlot Gang-Rapes High School Soccer Team
Helsinki, Finland (DDNS) The stories just keep getting stranger and
stranger as time goes by. Forget about mass murders at high schools, attempts to blow up schools and all the other violence that is so common today. This story is more unbelievable than all the others preceding it and also has a strange twist. An elderly adult committed the alleged crime against the children, the school and the society.
Police arrested Aloysha Paquette , an 89 year old spinster and charged her with gang-rape, multiple counts of involuntary deviant sexual intercourse, sodomy, corruption of morals of minors and several other
charges after no less than 8 teenage boys accused her of taking advantage
of their youth, vitality and a lot more.
The alleged incident happened after a high school soccer match between
Bothnia Lapland High School and their arch rival West Cold
Balls Boys School and Military Academy. The Bothnia boys were soundly beaten 3-0
on their own high school turf. Post game, Aloysha Paquette reportedly entered
the Bothnia locker room where the dejected students were showering and
took advantage of the young naive teenagers.
Maxim Litovsk, 15, captain of the Bothnia Lapland High School team explained: That old fucking slut came in there with a gun and a knife. She forced me to shoot cum all over her and then she ass fucked me with her pistol as she made all the other team members stand in a line and
squirt their loads in her face and mouth. She is nuts- and she should be locked up for the rest of her life. Shes obviously very dangerous.
Thats not the full story, according to Bogart Z. Boswind, another
player from the losing soccer team. I had to give her all 9 inches
of my bogart junior. Believe it or not, Ive been saving myself for
the right girl. Now Im ruined for life. My Dad has a pistol at home.
Im going to end it all tonight. I feel so violated!
Aloysha Paquette has no prior criminal record whatsoever. As a matter of
fact she was a Nun in the Helsinki St. Bonapartism Holy Ecumenical Church
for 60 years. When asked about the alleged incident in the boys locker
room Aloysha Paquette merely responded- What, huh?
Police escorted the 89 year old alleged geriatric slut out of the locker
room. She was in there, thats for sure commented Police
private (trainee) Bjorn Korjd. Whether any of these alleged acts occurred
will be borne out in the DNA tests that are pending.
Aloysha Paquette has been put in the Helsinki Cold Retainer Jail #34 until
DNA results are finalized. That process may take up to a month. Our reporter talked with Aloysha Paquette in the frigid Jail #34. Her comments were... What, huh?, What, huh?,
What, huh?.
Copyright © Dan Sroka, 5/22/99,
4/08
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