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Berserk Briefs by Dan Sroka

Sludge Santos had been boozing heavily for more than 55 years. On more than one occasion, Dr. Hector Kilroy told him he had to stop drinking, or it would take his life. Sludge refused to listen, and now he was dying. Dr. Kilroy told Santos- “You have a month to live. You will die a horrible and painful death. We will have to put you on artificial life support as your liver, kidneys, heart, intestines and stomach are destroyed”. Sludge Santos cried, knowing it all was over. Then, he processed Kilroy’s words “artificial life support”. “Good golly”, he thought, “I can start all over again. And, I can’t destroy these, cause they’re artificial”. Santos requested that Dr. Kilroy hook him up to the IV to the keg of beer next to his hospital bed, which he did. Sludge Santos died that evening, in a drunken stupor, when the electric power was cut off to the hospital.


Copyright © Dan Sroka 5/26/01



Berserk Briefs by Dan Sroka

Relations with China have been strained as of recent. Political games and posturing aside- there is a real threat to China/US relations. The Chinese government has not made it public yet, but word is out that the Daxian Peoples Rubber Mill has gone on strike. The peasants working there were making the equivalent of 4 cents a week for an 85 hour work week. The workers walked- demanding 5 cents a week and a daily bowl of white rice. The government balked. What does this all have to do with China/US relations? Let it be known that the Daxian Peoples Rubber Mill produces 90% of the dildos and 80% of the condoms sent to the US. What are YOU going to do now?

Copyright © Dan Sroka 5/26/01, 3/08




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